(Read 1 John 1)
Some people have battle scars, but my buddy (J) has battle gashes. I was recently notified by a church email that he was on life support, and the outlook wasn’t favorable. I couldn’t call him, so I left a message on his phone telling him that I loved him and was praying for him. Earlier today, we spoke for an hour and a half. (J) is a longtime friend from my old hometown. We haven’t kept in touch much since my family moved away four years ago. We caught up, and he shared his story with me.
“I first felt a relationship with Jesus Christ when I lost my business in 2012. I owned a few assisted living facilities and was making a lot of money. I had everything, and I lost everything. I think the reason is that I gave thanks for none of it. I gave God none of the glory. I’m not saying God took it away because I don’t think He works that way but in no way, shape, or form was I glorifying His name. I did the work. I had the compassion, but I never gave anything back financially or otherwise for God.”
Not to us, Lord, not to us
but to your name be the glory,
because of your love and faithfulness.
Why do the nations say,
“Where is their God?”
Our God is in heaven;
he does whatever pleases him.
But their idols are silver and gold,
made by human hands.
Psalm 115:1-4
When wonderful things happen for us, glory should only be given to God, not God’s people. Because of God’s mercy and truth, He is worthy of all praise and glory. We need that reminder to keep us from being tempted to think we’re in charge of our lives. God uses some of the challenging moments to bring us down to size. Each breath we take gives us one more chance to reflect on His glory.
“Things were so bad,” (J) admitted, “that it came to the point where I had to take my children back to their mother, and it wasn’t a real good situation. I lived day to day, hour to hour. And I started digging into learning about God because I didn’t truly know God. I thought I knew everything. I knew nothing. I acquired knowledge in Sunday school, Bible stories, and sermons, the things you hear at church on a Sunday service.” (J)’s story reminded me that knowledge isn’t wisdom.
God gives us choices but left on our own; we’re going to make the wrong ones more often. (J) explained how his life turned over again. “I’m a recovering alcoholic,” he said. “I have had some years of sobriety, but I’ve always struggled. The reason I couldn’t stop drinking is plainly explained in the third step of Alcoholics Anonymous.” Surrendering will is a matter of ego and fear. (J) confirmed it. “I was never willing to turn my will over to God fully. Being the self-sufficient, self-centered, individualistic alcoholic I am, I would often pretend to give my life to God, but when big decisions had to be made, I wouldn’t. November 11th of 2020 was my last drink — I fully turned my life over to Jesus Christ on that day.”
For the hearts of these people are hardened,
and their ears cannot hear,
and they have closed their eyes—
so their eyes cannot see,
and their ears cannot hear,
and their hearts cannot understand,
and they cannot turn to me
and let me heal them.’
Matthew 13:15
Receiving Jesus makes our lives full and meaningful, giving us a greater grasp of God’s truth. (J) kept resisting, I keep resisting, and at times, we all do. When we are more interested in our knowledge than Jesus’ wisdom, we tend to see less value in anything He ever taught. Spiritual blindness accompanies our stubborn hearts. If our wills are opposed to Jesus, our sins aren’t confessed or forgiven. In this case, we’ll never change. Retaining self-control is a conscious choice and a condition of the heart.
“On Palm Sunday, I was clipping my dog’s nails. I had never done it before because my dog was a rescue, and the people who owned him before us violently abused him and would always cut his nails way too short. So, when I clipped one too short, he bit me pretty darn good. At first, I ignored it. Okay, I can handle this, I thought. But it got infected, and I finally went to urgent care. For some reason, they closed the wound and stitched it up.”
(J)’s situation kept getting worse. His hand was so swollen that he had to be rushed to the ER. “My BP was 79/90. Because of Covid, the ER was packed, so I spent two-and-a-half days before I finally got a room.” In some ways, (J) believes God prepared him for this event. “It was then that my kidneys were failing. And the renal doctor kept saying, ‘We don’t know what’s happening. Your kidneys keep getting worse. I’m a couple of minutes away from calling down a dialysis machine for you.’” As a sign of surrender, (J) replied to the Doctor, “Whatever you got to do.” (J) continued, “This whole time, I was praying. I had no fear whatsoever of dying. None. They finally moved me up to a room. Very early the next morning, the renal doctor came in and said, ‘Mr. (J) you’re a miracle!’ And I said, ‘What do you mean, what do you mean?’ The Doctor said, ‘I looked at your tests this morning. Your kidneys are healed!’ ‘Oh, my goodness, do you know why I asked?’ She looked at me and smiled. I said, ‘I do! God saved me!’” (J) was getting justifiably emotional describing this to me. I had a difficult time getting all his words right. “I just blew up.” Emotional again, (J) returned to his story, “God said, I want to keep you, I want to watch you and strengthen you.”
“The next morning was Easter. At 5 am, I woke up, and I don’t know why. I was lying in the hospital bed, still tethered to all the tubes and machines. I asked God why He woke me up. Looking over to the window, I saw a huge, beautiful full moon covered by thin clouds, with a brilliant beam of light bursting through the hole in the clouds, shining right into my room. I was shouting, “Hey, hey, somebody! I got out of bed and managed to take a picture. I prayed and cried. The sun rose. I was flabbergasted. I’m a new person and a different person.” (J) then referenced a song by Aerosmith. “In the blink of an eye when you finally see the light.” His kids came in that Easter morning, and they all went home. It left a lifelong impression on him. “I prayed hard for all the people I left behind in that hospital.”
This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:5-2:5
At the time of his health crisis, (J) was in an adulterous relationship with a married woman. He said, “I knew it was wrong. She knew it was wrong. I justified it because her husband was abusive to her. After getting home from the hospital, I sat in front of my computer, then closed my eyes. I completely broke down about what had happened—wailing and crying. Next thing you know, I’m lifted from my chair and put on the floor. I was out of my body at the time. On my knees, the Holy Spirit says I’m no use to God, anything, or anyone until I stop that adulterous relationship, that I learn how to treat women properly and that they are not toys for my manipulation and satisfaction. The Holy Spirit said, ‘Repent!’ All I could say was I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”
The Apostle John made some solid points in the Scripture above which apply today. Society has come up with other words for sin. Adultery becomes sponsorship. A lie becomes misspoke. Renaming these difficult words doesn’t hide their ugliness, deceit, or unrighteousness. Sin is not the same as a mistake. Sinning is deliberate. (J) knew his behavior was wrong. It was an offense to the woman he was with, her family, (J)’s family, and God. It was both a mistake and also a sin. (J) is a proud, loving, deeply-caring man who doesn’t make excuses for his sins. When we walk in Christ’s light, God forgets our sins, and the darkness is washed away with His blood.
“This past summer, my Urologist called me after a blood test and said, I needed to have radiation or have my prostate removed ASAP. I think this was related to God. He told me that sexuality and the relationship between a man and a woman are sacred and sanctified. The doctor was concerned that cancer had spread out of my prostate. I had the surgery, and afterward, he said, ‘We got it. Now you can go on with your life.’ Here I am. That episode in itself was a miracle.”
If you’re not seeing it yet, (J)’s story is a trail of miracles. He continued, “My conscious mind changed after these first two incidents, which prepared me for yet another event I didn’t know was coming! I’ve been having problems with the right side of my abdomen. I knew something was wrong, but no one could diagnose the problem. Two days after New Year’s, the pain was so bad that I called the hospital, and they said it sounded like my appendix. They wanted me in right away! I don’t know what I was thinking, but I grabbed a burger at Burger King on the way there. When I got to the ER, they slapped their heads and said, ‘You can’t eat before you go under the knife!’” (J) had to wait 10-12 hours in debilitating pain in the ER before they could even consider surgery on his appendix.
Then came the real drama. “The pain was unbearable. I needed something. I have to say, my behavior was horrible. I was crying fitfully, making a big scene. So, after hours of this torment, I reared back as hard as possible on my gurney and blasted a door, knocking it off its hinges. Luckily, it didn’t shatter. I didn’t know what to do. Immediately, the whole hospital reacted! Security was ready to tase me, but the nurses shouted, ‘No, you can’t tase him.’ I stopped and said thank you. I needed something. Shortly after, they informed me that my GI tract was clean and finally ready for surgery.”
The Surgery was a Success
“After the surgery, I asked if I could call my son to pick me up. Right then, something happened. I flatlined. I had to be resuscitated. Everything went wacko, crazy. Nobody knew what was going on. This is all I remember because I lost consciousness. They ended up putting in feeding tubes and a ventilator.”
He was in there for many days. I remember the messages and phone calls about (J). Prayers were barraging God from all over the world. My wife and I prayed passionately while waiting for some news. Anything. (J) said, “Nobody gave me a chance. My best friend came and said he sat there for 2 hours in disbelief that I was lying there. My kids were all freaking out; they didn’t know what to do either.”
“Maybe on the fourth day, I opened my eyes. I looked past my hands. And I saw my great friend, Pastor (M). ‘What are you doing here?’ I cried! And the nurses cried. And it was just so it was so sublime, surreal, and beautiful and wonderful and spiritual. I couldn’t stop asking everyone I came in contact with, ‘Do you believe in Christ Jesus?’ I’d say 90% said yes. I loved hearing their responses and stories. People would stop in and share what brought them to Christ. They told me family stories of people who died and came back.”
“I wanted so badly to go home and start healing. Instead, they were insistent that I go to rehab. I told them I wouldn’t stay in the hospital for three more weeks. I told them that I’d already discussed these things with God. We already have a plan for these things. ‘God wants me with my dog in my house, with my children helping me,’ I said. I was in constant conversation with God during this frustrating time. I needed strength not to become upset because I’m a stubborn man. They sent me home.”
(J) told me that he’d tell anyone suffering now never to give up. God is always there. He believes that God made him an alcoholic so that he can help others through his struggles and story. “A big thing with AA is the Golden Key. Prayer is the key to harmony and happiness. If you remove problems or worries from your mind and replace them with thoughts of God, they will disappear. We become what we think about.” Jim thinks about God. God is love.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13
Key Application:
- What do you think about most often? Is it God? Center your calm and stressful thoughts on Him. Put him in the front of your mind in all that you do.
- If your mind is on distractions, you might be unable to remove them altogether, but you can put them in their place through persistent prayer, reading, and chats with God.
Where else in your life can you live out the teachings of Christ? Look for next week’s Devotion.