My Sins, My Sins, My Savior
(Read Psalm 51)
Last week, our devotional focused on prayer. It covered how we pray, when we pray, why we pray, and even what we expect from our prayers. Of all the discussions I had with my family and friends about prayer, repentance never came up — why? Because I didn’t ask. I do repent regularly in my prayers, but the fact I didn’t mention it in my questions, must be a message that I don’t do it enough or well enough.
Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
Psalm 51:1-2
Psalm 51 was written by King David after stealing away Bathsheba from her husband and out of guilt, having Uriah killed in battle to cover up his affair. David knew his obvious wrongs against his neighbor, but his first concern was wronging God. The Psalm didn’t include excuses or atonements, and doesn’t try to divert God’s rightful anger. His repentance was much more than feeling badly for having wronged his neighbor, it was the realization that God was the most important offended party. David confessed with sincere humility before God without self-justification. Repentance occurs when our soul is repulsed by its attraction with sin and is doing something about it.
“Of course I repent in my prayers,” said one of my friends. “When praying, I humbly repent when I pray by asking for forgiveness.” For me, it’s a constant struggle to pray meaningfully. Every single day comes with new challenges for friends, family, and me, so it’s really easy to simply ask God to intervene and fix things. Smooth it out, make them go away. But, another friend enlightened me with his thought that, “Praying is not just asking God for things, or telling God what we want Him to do for us, it is about repentance and laying everything at the feet of Jesus.”
The religious side of us tricks us into feeling sorry for our sins only because of their consequences. Punishment causes remorse, and we avoid it at all costs. Religion teaches us right from wrong, but it cannot cover our sins.
Rend your heart
and not your garments.
Return to the Lord your God,
for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
and he relents from sending calamity.
Joel 2:13
“Rend” in the original Hebrew meant to split, tear, rip, to separate abruptly, violently. Rending your clothes was a public display of intense, unbearable grief. “Rend your heart,” on the other hand, referred to a broken heart. I look at it as starting over. It acknowledges a kind of brokenness, only to be mended by God’s forgiveness and restoration.
There are dramatic differences between remorse and repentance. Followers of Christ understand this difference. One friend of mine said, “I repent based on how I sin against Him with my mind, with my heart, and through my hands and eyes — the opposite of loving Him with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength.”
We are always sorry when sin catches up with us and we reap the results of our actions, but remorse doesn’t mean that someone has repented. Only godly sorrow leads to repentance. Remorse is feeling sorry while repentance means that we will change our behavior. “When repenting in my prayers, I ask for forgiveness for actions in my past and show gratitude for His faithfulness while waiting for me to surrender to his will.”
A friend mentioned to me that when repenting she, “Tries to praise God, then repents, then remembers what she’s grateful for, and then after that, presents her requests.” Now, that’s the right priority. Some people repent more methodically. Another friend divulged, his method. “I use the ACTS model most often when I pray.
A – Adoration …Praise God for how great and awesome He is
C – Confession … Confess and repent my sins to God and ask His forgiveness
T – Thanks …Give thanks ‘This is the day the Lord has made.’
S – Supplication …Ask that needs are met, for myself and others.”
We all promise God the world in our prayers. Even the most humble of us, often base some of our repentance on desire rather than commitment. It’s a spiritual muscle we have to strengthen. God knows my weaknesses, He knows that my repentance is sincere. He also knows that I’ll be back repenting to Him again and again. “I usually say something like: Lord, please forgive me and help me not do that again or be that way again… or help me understand why I did that.”
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9
“To repent basically means to turn and go in the other direction,” one friend wrote. He continued, “It’s an ongoing attitude or action resulting in fellowship with God which is what we were created for, thus, there comes a feeling of rightness or wholeness and restoration.”
God can’t help but listen when He hears us cry to Him with a broken heart. “In my prayers, I admit I was wrong and confess it to God,” said a friend. There’s no better time to repent than when we first record the need for it. “I stop what I’m doing, bow my head, confess my sin and ask God’s forgiveness,” another added.
I have mild ADD and thanks to genetics, a little bit of an addictive personality. When I do something once, I need to get my fix many times over. I have no addiction issues with drugs, alcohol, or pornography, but I’m addicted to many other bad habits. Consequently, repentance is a regular part of my faith life. He realizes we’re not perfect. It’s the authentic change God wants to see. “With my desire to avoid sinning when tempted, I ask God to intervene at those instances,” agreed a friend.
What do we repent about? You name it. “Sins and shortcomings,” said one friend. I know we all sin but I was shocked to hear this from a friend who doesn’t have a skeptical bone in her body, “I actually had to repent to God this week about doubting Him, about lacking faith. There’s a whole list of other things I repent about… stuff I say, stuff I do, stuff I don’t do, stuff I think. I sin a lot,” she ended with.
Adding to my surprise, another friend talked about her need for repentance in areas of self-care and discipline. She is one of the most fit people I know who’s close to my age. She said, “For me, it can be for spending too much money unnecessarily, not being disciplined in some area like eating or taking care of the physical body that I feel blessed with.”
“I repent about anything the Holy Spirit convicts me of doing that is out of God’s will, especially when I know at that time what I said or did was not in accordance with God’s will and doesn’t represent my walk with Christ.”
So many of our struggles come from our tongue and our hearts. “Spontaneous negative thoughts, and pride when thinking I know best for various situations,” said another friend. His wife chimed in, “I repent when I get angry and say things I regret, when I disobey God, when I don’t go to God and try to fix it, and when I don’t focus on God. I focus on the world sometimes.”
All of this just goes to show that like an iceberg, we have so much going on under the surface. We don’t know half of what someone is thinking or going through. Being weak and vulnerable, there will always be a need for us to repent until we join our Lord in His Kingdom.
“Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.”
Acts 3:19
“After I repent, I feel relief knowing that Jesus’ blood washes me clean and I have renewed chances to do better,” my friend said. Another piled on, “I feel humbled and grateful. I feel like the 1 lost sheep that He came looking for and I’ll always be grateful for that.”
Jesus doesn’t expect perfection from us. He doesn’t want remorse pretending to be something greater. Repentance is recognizing Jesus’ Kingship and submitting to it, despite the fact that we’re pulled in the opposite direction. Repentance is a plea for God to change our distracted heart.
When we’re facing a judge in court, we are on trial for offending our neighbor. When we’re facing God, the righteous judge in court, we are on trial for offending Him. Repentance will lead to a cure for our brokenness and can mend our affronts to God. I often remind myself of the good news that our sins aren’t the end of the story. Romans teaches us that, “…There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus…” We are saved!
With that said, we will continue to be a work in progress. We will continue to repent as long as we create the need for it. “I feel at peace because our God is a forgiving God and I strive to not to do it again. Operative word strive!” a friend told me.
“Afterwards I still feel a bit icky that I needed to repent AGAIN! After a bit of reminding myself that I am human and that Jesus died so that I can repent… I feel better, but I still try to keep myself reminded of what I needed to repent of,” my neighbor added.
Legalistic remorse says, “I broke God’s rules,” while real repentance says, “I broke God’s heart.”
Timothy Keller
Here are some additional thoughts shared with me this week about repentant prayers:
“I feel peace and gratitude for God’s Grace and His promises.”
“I feel relieved and loved.”
“I feel more at peace when I confess my sins.”
I feel renewed and lifted as well but ultimately, repentance is not only about how we feel and what we get out of it, but that when we repent, we are made whole again. He lifts the burdens from us. Jesus went to the cross because of our sins. Our repentance shows Him that we can do better next time.
I slay Jesus Christ with my sins and cry out to Him for forgiveness throughout each and every day. One day we will get this right.
My sins, my sins, my Savior,
How sad on Thee they Fall
John S. B. Monsell
Key Applications:
- Do you ever repent when you pray?
- How do you do this?
- What kinds of things do you repent about?
- How do you feel afterwards?
What are you going to do about it? Consider each of these questions each day in your prayers this week. Make a commitment to change.
Where else in your life can you live out the teachings of Christ? Look for next week’s Devotion.