Righteous or Self-Righteous Anger
(Read Numbers 20)
Earlier this week, a close friend from my church broke down and shared the all-encompassing anger he’s been living with. He suffered a horrific family tragedy back in August, one from which it could take him a lifetime to recover. It was so sad and shocking to see him this broken. Our group of friends is very close so my friend shared more after his outburst, and then we discussed it for a while. I don’t think he felt any better as a result of our talk but at the very least he knows he’s loved and prayed for.
Christian author and speaker, Joyce Meyer, once wrote that, “Anger is not a sin—it is what you do with it that becomes sin.” It sounds so logical doesn’t it? This thought is echoed through both the Old and New Testaments. Ironically, there are many things in the Bible that are implied but not declared. Anger, however, isn’t one of those things.
And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NLT)
What are we supposed to do with anger? Well, Proverbs 14:29 says we should be, “Slow to anger.” A few chapters later in Proverbs, we’re told that fools, “vent their anger” while the wise, “quietly hold it back,” but that’s easier said than done. It also doesn’t mean that we should ignore our anger, it means that we need to control it and recognize how we express it.
Restraint.
I have come to learn that I sometimes experience anger issues. I’m not an angry person, far from it. I am one of those people who is laid back and gentle, but if something unexpectedly goes wrong, I can explode. Then, I’m done and calm again. It’s not healthy – it’s who I am. I’m definitely a fool when it comes to losing my temper. The wise King Solomon wrote many versus of Proverbs pointing towards me.
Is it wrong to be angry? It depends upon the anger, but from a Christian perspective, no. Is it OK to be angry with God? The friend I mentioned earlier is angry at the world not at God, although he said he looks forward to a long conversation with Him. A better question might be: Is it OK to be blunt with God? I believe that as a father, God welcomes our honesty. He cherishes the relationship with we have with Him and openness is part of any true relationship.
But it displeased Jonah exceedingly, and he was angry. And he prayed to the Lord and said, “O Lord, is not this what I said when I was yet in my country? That is why I made haste to flee to Tarshish; for I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster. Therefore now, O Lord, please take my life from me, for it is better for me to die than to live.” And the Lord said, “Do you do well to be angry?”
Jonah 4:1-4
Displeased was an understatement. Jonah was flush with seething anger. Why didn’t God destroy the Ninevites? Why didn’t God listen to his plans? It seems silly when we look at this from our perspective and wonder why Jonah didn’t realize that God knows things we will never know. He questioned God with brutal honesty. We do too. Anger comes in many forms but God only endorses one — righteous anger. Petty, ego-driven, self-righteous, vengeful anger is what I call stupid anger. We need to remember what God said about vengeance, it’s not ours to give.
My friend has profound faith. It might be the single largest contributor of him staying grounded right now. He shares and commiserates with people he’s close with, he opens up to our group, and most importantly, he talks with God. I was going to write, “talks TO God,” but I know for a fact that my friend has conversations “with” God, he doesn’t lecture Him. I’ve seen my friend get hot and bothered about a lot of things that I would classify as stupid anger, but the anger he is currently living with is not an emotional outburst, it is a result of a significant loss. It’s the kind of loss that no one is prepared for. God understands this kind of pain. God understands this kind of anger.
Another friend who was the last guest to arrive to a barbecue one day declared, “Sorry I’m late, I just came from my anger management class.” I thought he was joking and laughed. He smiled and asked me what I was laughing at? That intimidated me. His heart and his frame are huge. I thought, uh oh, I touched a nerve. We never know what’s inside someone’s head or what they’re dealing with so we should be restrained when we randomly get mad at someone. We can’t see inside, we can only let them see what’s inside of us.
In our polarized world, it’s difficult to have a differing opinion about anything without inciting anger. Society doesn’t care much about righteous anger. It views anger in terms of being validated rather than something that’s offensive to God. Is it easy to distinguish righteous anger from stupid anger? You bet. Righteous anger is redemptive not vindictive. It is controlled not explosive. Righteous anger is usually short-lived and not a festering grudge. Vengeful anger has the potential to destroy our health, our family, our community, and ourselves.
But the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not trust me enough to demonstrate my holiness to the people of Israel, you will not lead them into the land I am giving them!”
Numbers 20:12
Look at what anger did to Moses. The fist time the Bible recorded his anger, he murdered a fellow Egyptian and hid in the desert for 40 years. The next time, at Mt. Sinai he saw his people worshipping a golden calf and in disgust, smashed a tablet that God inscribed the Ten Commandments on. The last time he got angry caused a problem with God. Moses was being pressed by his angry followers to do something about finding water. They were heckling him, doubting both him and God. Understandably, Moses was frustrated. To extract water, he took his staff and struck a rock that God commanded him to speak to, not once but twice. Moses beating the rock showed anger and lack of faith in God. He notices when we lash out in anger, especially when it shows no trust in Him. As a result of this impulsive behavior, Moses wouldn’t make it to the promised land, instead he would be on the outside, looking in.
I have complete faith in God’s healing love. He knows where my friend’s pain is coming from. He knows that the anger will fade as my friend grows hope in places he didn’t know existed. My friend’s anger is harsh and raw, but it’s completely understandable. He’s shielding his heart from the pain of his circumstances. His obedience to his faith of Jesus will get him through this trial. Every privilege Jesus ever had is transferred to my friend because of his faith. Like a seed, his anger will become something beautiful he never expected. God knows my friend will finish well.
Even Jesus Christ got angry. Turning tables over in a crowded temple certainly didn’t hide His rage. Jesus demonstrated what righteous anger looked like. When it’s righteous, it doesn’t look like a sin. It can’t because Jesus never did.
The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
James 1:20
Key Application:
- Do you think it’s right to get angry? Do you see the difference between good and bad anger? If you’re confused, use the Bible to help you discern.
- Read Numbers 20. If you’re experiencing anger, what can you do to prevent it from controlling you?
Where else in your life can you live out the teachings of Christ? Look for next week’s Devotion.